Hearts and Arrows Box Set Read online

Page 17


  Another painting struck her: a woman with lily-white skin, stark against the low cut of her dark gown and dark hair, her long nose proud and elegant, a high contrast to the brown wall behind her. She was the epitome of quiet sexuality and power.

  And then Lex came to one that she couldn’t move herself away from of a woman with dark hair and soft, sad eyes. One hand rested on the hip of her black dress, the other on a table with a peach rose laying a few inches away from her poised fingers. Lex leaned forward, seeing every stroke, every layer that made up the whole. Her fingers itched to run across the woman’s face, to feel the marks of the brush that told the story of her sadness.

  After a while, she turned and took a seat next to Dean on the bench. She took a heavy breath.

  “I can see how this place would be an escape for you.”

  Dean nodded. “You stopped in front of my favorite painting.” His hands were clasped, hanging between his thighs. “As a kid, I was pretty much on my own. That painting … there’s something about it that always called me here.”

  On his own? Questions rolled through her mind, and she thought carefully about whether or not she should ask, not wanting to push him to tell her anything he wasn’t ready to, but sensing that he wanted to tell her.

  She paused before asking, “Why were you on your own?”

  “As long as I can remember, there were men around. Sometimes my mom would leave me for days with nothing but a stack of peanut butter sandwiches in the fridge and the TV to keep me company. When she wasn’t with them, she was at work. We weren’t very close.” He stared at the painting of the woman in her black dress, looking through it as he spoke.

  Lex’s heart was a rock in her chest. “You were just a boy.”

  Dean nodded. “I took care of myself, and she took care of herself. She died when I was sixteen.”

  His life made hers look charmed. “Dean, I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry.”

  Dean shrugged. “Things got better after that. I moved in with Roe. He and I … well, we’ve been friends for a very long time.”

  “I can’t even imagine what you’ve been through. I’ve always been close with my mother, but my dad left when I was a kid. My mom, she’s a little crazy.” Lex chuckled, the sound wrong in her ears in such a somber place, in such a somber conversation. “When he left, the life went out of her, like all of the color left her world, and she was left with only gray. She can’t move on, like she’s been waiting all this time for him to come home. I don’t ever want to hurt like that.”

  His sad, green eyes looked down at her, and he slipped his arm around her waist. Lex laid her head on his chest, and he rested his cheek in her hair as they watched the woman in black.

  They spent hours wandering around the Met, and though Lex had been to the museum plenty of times, she’d never seen it like she had through his eyes. He knew about the artists and told her stories behind so much of the work there, but the real pleasure had been in seeing the joy on his face, the light in his eyes when he talked about each piece. She was impressed by how much he knew, feeling like she’d gotten a private tour as they walked through the expansive museum.

  They descended the steps of the Met after dusk and made their way to a restaurant a few blocks away, chatting amiably. Every time they touched, like when he laid his hand on her back to guide her into the restaurant, she was aware of every nerve affected and wished she could hold his hand, kiss him. She wanted his arm over her shoulder or to be tucked into his chest.

  She realized at that point that getting out of the date without kissing Dean would probably be impossible. What she’d learned about him in those few hours, the solidification of everything that she felt for him, all of it added up to leaving Travis. In her mind it was over and only a matter of telling him. The only other decision left to be made was between her and Dean.

  Lex knew as she sat across from him in the small, crowded restaurant that she wanted to know him. She wanted to trust him after the hours they’d had together, even if part of her didn’t think she should. A bigger part of her already did trust him, and the way that she felt was so new, so intense, that she knew it couldn’t be denied.

  Her nerves fluttered, anxious to talk about them, to figure out if he felt the same, and what they would do about it.

  Dean watched her as she talked, her cheeks pink from the warmth of the restaurant and the wine in her glass. He felt a smile on his lips, the same smile that he had been wearing since he’d met her at the coffee shop.

  He’d told her more, felt more, wanted more in the few hours they had spent together than he ever had in his life. He wanted her to know him, wanted to know her. He wanted to give her everything, to protect her, and though he had always doubted that he’d ever be able to be faithful, as if infidelity was a disease he’d been cursed with, he believed that he’d found someone he could cherish, worship.

  When she ordered a rack of ribs for dinner with a grin, he’d smiled and ordered the same, and the two of them laughed as they ate, their faces and fingers covered in barbecue sauce, gnawing on their dinner like animals. The waiter brought them hot towels and swept away the piles of bones they’d cleaned.

  Lex sat back in her seat and laid her towel on the small plate. “Whew, man. I am so full.” She laid her hands on her belly.

  “Then I’ve done my job.” Dean leaned on the table and took a drink to fortify himself, ready to tell her how he felt, though he was terrified of her reaction. “Lex …”

  She straightened up too and leaned forward, her eyes full of hope, which made him feel better and scared him, all at once. She laid her hands on the table, and he reached for one, slipping his fingers around hers, his thumb grazing her knuckles.

  “Today … this day has been more than I ever thought it could be. I didn’t know … I mean, I didn’t realize it could be like this, and I want to try. We have to try, because I don’t think I can walk away from you, Lex. Not unless you want me to.”

  “I don’t want you to walk away, and I don’t want to, either.” Her eyes shone, brimming with tears, and his fears left him with his breath.

  All he wanted was to hold her, to kiss her, to give it all to her, along with his heart that beat like a drum in his chest. They both leaned forward, but the table between them held them apart.

  “You’re too far away from me right now, Lex.”

  She laughed, the sound tight as she held back a sob. “Well, then maybe we should get out of here.”

  They paid their check and left, and he pulled her into his side, pressing a kiss into her hair as they hurried to the subway and made their way to his apartment.

  Lex walked into Dean’s place, and her eyes went straight to his wall-to-wall bookshelves, packed with records. Her mouth hung open as she absently shrugged off her jacket and scarf, tossed them in an armchair, and dropped down to sit on the hardwood floor.

  As she flipped through the albums, she found some of her favorites, like The Smashing Pumpkins’ Siamese Dream. She found Fleetwood Mac’s Rumors, and George’s 45’s in the singles. She pulled one out and trailed her finger across the words on the old label before sliding it back where it belonged. The next treasure she found was The Smith’s single, “How Soon is Now,” and she dropped her hand into her lap.

  Her eyes ran across the hundreds of records on his shelves in awe before she turned to Dean. His legs were open as he leaned back on the couch, hands in his lap, watching her with shrouded eyes. His black hair begged her to run her hands through it, and her fingers tingled as she wondered if the black stubble on his jaw was soft or scratchy, wondered what it would feel like against her neck. And then she decided she would find out.

  Lex stood and laid the 45 on the record player, set the needle on, and Morrissey crooned from the speakers. She turned to Dean, and their eyes locked. Nothing existed, except his eyes.

  Her breath was shallow as she walked to the couch and slid her knee outside his thigh, reaching for the back of the couch as she slid the ot
her in, dropping down to sit softly in his lap. He lifted his face to hers, and she cupped it in her hands, looking into his eyes for a long moment before slipping her fingers into his hair with a sigh. Her lips moved closer and closer to his until they were almost touching, and she lingered, but he wouldn’t wait. His hands moved up her thighs to her hips, and he pulled her to him, their lips pressing together, hot and hungry, and the world fell away.

  He held her close as his hands roamed up her back and down again, breaking away to kiss her jaw and down her long neck. She laid her palms on his chest, ran them over his shoulders, down to his stomach, and her fingers hooked under the hem of his shirt, sending a shock up his body when her fingertips touched his skin. He broke away, and she pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it behind her. His hands moved up her waist, under her sweater, and she smiled as she stretched her arms over her head. He lifted it off and threw it, then buried his face in her breasts with his hands splayed across her back as she twisted his hair in her fists. He thumbed her nipples, kissing them through the lace of her bra, and she hung her head back with her lips parted, her eyes closed, and her hair hanging behind her in a dark sheet.

  He grabbed her around the waist with one arm and flipped her onto the couch as he pressed his lips to hers. She reached for his belt, their lips never breaking as she fumbled to open it. Once loosened, she popped his button and slipped her hands down the soft skin of his stomach, his back arching when her fingers trailed his length. He pressed himself into her until she let him go and wound her arms around his neck, pulling her body up to his, and his hand moved to cup her neck, holding her face to his as they kissed. He laid her down, his fingertips skimming her skin down to the hem of her pants. He unzipped them and slid his hand into her panties, never breaking their kiss. He found her wanting, and she kicked her chin back, gasping when he touched her.

  She closed her eyes, every thought consumed by him. She moaned his name, but at the sound of it, another flashed in her mind.

  Travis.

  Her heart skipped as she lifted her head and her lids popped open. “Wait,” she breathed.

  He slowed his hand. “What’s wrong?” he asked against her breast.

  She looked down at his hot, green eyes, and her body betrayed her, rolling against his hand. How could she possibly stop? She pulled his face to hers and kissed him long as she lost herself again.

  “Wait!” She pulled away. “I’m sorry,” she panted.

  She scooted back and sat, laying her hands on his chest. “We can’t do this … not yet, not until I’ve told Travis. It’s just … we’re already doing something wrong, and I don’t think we should make it any worse.” She looked up at him, wishing everything was behind her instead of in front of her. “Give me tomorrow to end things, and tomorrow night, I’m yours.”

  Dean ran a hand through his hair, exasperated, then looked back at Lex. Her eyes were heavy lidded and smoldering, her lips red and swollen, her fingers like fire on his skin. It wasn’t any easier for her than for him, he realized, so he pulled her against his chest and kissed her hair.

  “Promise?”

  She kissed his chest and promised.

  ———— Olympus ————

  The theater room broke into chatter, and Dita accepted a few congratulations from some of the gods.

  Eros leaned over the back of his chair. “Did the alarm go off? Did you just win?”

  “No,” she answered, “they can’t really be together until Travis is entirely out of their way, so it looks like Apollo is down to a matter of hours before it’s over.” Dita spoke loudly enough that most everyone heard, including Apollo. A few of the gods’ eyes darted between the two of them, but Apollo was unfazed, only sat calmly in his seat with a small smile on his lips.

  Apollo shook his head. “It’s not over until the fat lady sings, and Hera’s been mostly silent, so it seems I still have time.”

  Everyone laughed except Hera, who exploded the room with her eyes.

  “Well, Apollo, I hope you’ve got a good play to make, because this game is mine.”

  “You’re always so sure of yourself, even when you’re wrong.” Apollo looked almost cheery as he stood, winking at her before he left the room.

  Dita’s eyes narrowed as she watched him leave. “He’s bluffing.”

  Perry eyeballed her. “Maybe.”

  “Whose side are you on?”

  “Yours, dummy. But it would be stupid to count him out.”

  “I just have to hold them together for a few more hours. What could he possibly do between now and then?” Dita shook her head. “No, he’s definitely bluffing.”

  “Okay, denial.” Perry clearly wasn’t buying it.

  “Look, there’s an infinitesimal possibility that he could stop what I’ve got in motion, but the force at which they’re moving is so great that I can’t imagine what he could do to stop it. I just don’t know if he’s got it in him.” But Dita was unsure, nibbling on her lip at the thought, knowing that she’d need to be on her game until it was over.

  Apollo’s face fell the second the elevator doors closed. He wiped his sweaty palms on his pants and rubbed his brow. Watching Lex and Dean on their date was torture. He’d sat throughout the day with his chest in a vice from the stress of it all, his prophecy in the back of his mind as he worried over whether or not he’d made the right choice. But there was no going back, and he prayed to the stars that his plan would work. It had to work.

  Day 13

  LEX’S ALARM BLARED AT HER from the coffee table in her living room, and she almost fell off the couch from the surprise as she fumbled for the device to shut it up. Her heart beat fast from the shock, and she looked around, mildly confused as to why she had been sleeping on the couch. The day before came back to her in a rush.

  She’d floated home the night before after leaving Dean’s, sobering on the way as she steeled herself to talk to Travis, hoping he’d still be awake. She and Dean agreed that the first step was for her to tell Travis the truth. She was sure he would understand, somehow. He had to. Dean hadn’t been so sure.

  Phase two was that she and Travis needed to come up with a plan to tell the band. Everything hinged on his reaction, and though she felt confident he’d understand, there was a part of her that wasn’t one-hundred-percent convinced. She knew that if the tables were turned, she would be hurt. She would understand, but she would be hurt. And then to throw in the whole band layer on top of that?

  There was no waiting. Travis needed to know, and she and Dean had to deal with the repercussions of that.

  She’d unlocked her door and stepped into their dark apartment, her heart sinking as she realized he was asleep. She walked into their room, whispered his name, just in case, but he hadn’t stirred. Her guilt burned fresh as she watched him, his chest rising and falling in the soft, blue light.

  When she sat down on the couch to take off her shoes, exhaustion hit her like a ton of bricks. The last thing she remembered was pulling her boots off and leaning back on the couch with a sigh.

  Lex rubbed her eyes and cursed when she felt the crunch of mascara under her fingers. She hauled herself off the couch and walked softly to the bedroom. Travis’ arm hung off the side of the bed, and his lips parted as he snored lightly. Lex chewed her lip, knowing she didn’t have time to talk to him before she left, so she snuck into the bathroom, washed her face and brushed her teeth, and twisted her hair up. She smelled Dean on her sweater as she pulled it over her head, breathing him in for a moment before she stripped down. She threw on her New Order t-shirt, jeans, and Chuck Taylors before tiptoeing out.

  She texted Dean on her way to the subway.

  Hey, you up?

  A few seconds later, her phone rang. Her heart skipped as she answered.

  “Hey,” she said, smiling.

  “Hey,” he answered, his voice low and rumbling. “How did it go?”

  “Well, it didn’t. He was asleep when I got home, and I didn’t want to wake him up
. I passed out on the couch and didn’t think it was fair to wake him up this early just to break up with him.”

  He sighed on the other end of the line.

  “I know. I’ll have to talk to him tonight. You guys are off early, right?”

  “Yeah. But that means I’ve got to play it cool at practice.”

  “I’m sorry. God, this is horrible.”

  “Don’t be sorry. And this nowhere near what I would call horrible.”

  She smiled down at her shoes, pausing at the stairs to the subway. “So, I’ve figured out how to tell him, and then … well, we have to see what he wants to do, how he wants to tell the band. I … I just want to handle it as delicately and respectfully as possible, which is already damaged by the fact that I’m leaving him for you.”

  “I wish this was easier on you. I should have just left you alone, but I couldn’t. You know that, right? I couldn’t walk away, as selfish as it was.”

  “I’m glad you didn’t. You have no idea how glad.” She took a breath. “It will be okay, we’ve just got to get through this next part, and then? We can be together.”

  “I’m ready.”

  “Me too.” Lex glanced at her watch. “Listen, I have to catch the train. I’ll come over tonight after I talk to Travis. It might be late, though.”

  “It doesn’t matter. I’ll wait for you.”

  Her cheeks were on fire. “Okay. Good luck today.”

  “You too. I’ll see you then.”

  She made her way into the subway, her head light as she descended and swiped her card to pass through the turnstile. Her phone buzzed in her pocket, and she pulled it out to find a text from Kara.

  OMG how have I not heard from you? I need details before I explode.

  Lex smiled as she tapped out a reply.

  It was everything.

  Her phone buzzed again almost immediately.